So I was unable to post yesterday due to some Dr. appointments that took quite a bit longer that I expected and then some Legal running around and then of course grocery store shopping. So I do have to share, I had a heart monitor put on yesterday and the Dr. who put it on with the bulky case and wires sticking out everywhere says to me, “you don’t have plans to go to the bank or the airport today do you?” I’m like no, why? he points to all the wires sticking out of my shirt, under my shirt and the black case at my waist and says, “probably not a good idea” then he winks 🙂 I’m thinking he’s probably right 🙂
So I also have to rant real quick about two of my pet peeves before I start my story for the day. These came from yesterdays experiences.
- When you get referred to go to different Doctors offices why is it that you have to fill out the same stinking paperwork for each Dr. you see. It’s like really? I have just spend 15 minutes filling this out at the last 5 other offices and with all the technology out there, you can’t find an app that will even fill in my name, address and birthdate before you hand to me? Maybe add in medication and health history? It’s so annoying. We need some techies to figure this out, you’d make a million !!!.
- Second when your at the grocery store and they have the plastic bags in the produce section, can you please at least put arrows on what it the top and the bottom! That at least would be a start to help me figure out after 10 minutes which end I’m trying to open. Then maybe a flap to help open them instead of standing there like an idiot trying to open it. Do I lick my fingers to help open it? Then do I touch the produce? ahhhhhh
Anyhow just a few things that were top of mind this morning. So again for those who have not read my “About page” I am attempting to write this blog day by day instead of the book my girls wanted me to write about my life and how I’ve got to where I am now. I am doing this for my two daughters and my two grandsons. I will of course be putting some relevant information and some humor in here as my life’s story is uhm quit a fiasco of humor, luck and hanging on by my fingernails and teeth from the pure grace of God.
There will be things that come to mind that I will share and this will more than likely not be in any order. There will be medical information that relates to our immediate family illness’s and support links from hospitals, support groups etc… that have helped us along the way.
So I’m really not sure where to start? Here goes, do I start from my childhood? Where the first memories I have are sitting in my moms car, we had just came out of the grocery store and I was standing in the back seat, she has left a bag of groceries in the front, she forgot something and had to run back in the store, I could see her from the car. I remember in the bag on top was a bottle of something orange that looked like candy. So of course what does any child do. Well you open and eat it. Well come to find out it was Children’s Baby Aspirin. Ooops
The next memories I have are of chasing my mom and dad down the hallway of a hospital which turns out to be Swedish Hospital in Seattle. I am not sure how long in between these two episodes the time lapse was, however these are my two very first memories of my childhood. I’m not sure if that is due to my past addictions or if these two items were just so out there, that they took the place of anything else.
I was three years old and I was very ill, turns out that the trauma from the aspirin brought about diabetes, insulin dependent. I remember the nurses and all the doctors, I remember my mom and dad would come to visit and I can see big large windows where the sun shown outside, there was a wide open play area where other kids were also playing on the floor, with tons of toys and a red wagon in the hallway. I remember I loved getting baths as the room the nurse would take me to was all pink tile from floor to ceiling just shiny shiny pink. I had to walk up two stairs to get the to tub, I thought that was the coolest ever, who has stairs in their bathroom I thought, It was clean and so pretty and for some reason I still think of that now and again and remember it vividly. So yes I was confirmed as insulin dependent at that point, I don’t remember how long I was in the hospital for.
I have memories of the landing on the moon, and watching it on TV remembering the excitement and tension in the air. My mom had posters on the side of our refrigerator of Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin and I remember I thought Neil was very handsome lol, I remember that poster was on our fridge forever. I would stare at this and the rocket and try to think why it was so important, I wanted to know what this was all about and what It meant. I was six at the time. I remember Nixon’s big head on the TV and posters all over of him doing the Peace Sign. I don’t think I’ll ever get that visual out of my head.
I was also now learning how to give my own insulin shots, a nurse came to our house and would sit with me and show me first how to do this with an orange, I would have to clean the orange with a alcohol pad, take the bottle of insulin, roll it between my palms, take the syringe hold the bottle upside down put the syringe in and pull back to the amount needed. I had to make sure there were no air bubbles as that was a huge deal and if there were I would have to tap my little fingers against the syringe until they were gone. I would then have to inject into the orange. After a couple weeks we moved from the orange to my upper thigh, ugh I hated this I would either not do it hard enough or a couple times I got the needle crooked, it hurt so bad, I could never seem to do it right so I’d have to redo it, my legs hurt and were full of holes. I really used to think that If I drank a lot of water it was going to start spraying out all the holes in my legs. I also had to pee in a bucket before taking my shots, I’d have to dip a strip in the bucket and match it to a color on the bottle of the strips to see what my blood sugar was. If it was to high I needed more insulin or if it was to low and I needed to eat something. I had to lean to rotate from thigh to thigh and move sections to not cause damage under my skin, this however didn’t work and even as of today I have issues with both of my upper thighs. As I got older I moved from my thighs to my stomach then to my arms, yep I could do one handed lol. Then I could also reach around and do my own fanny one handed. In fact my husband used to joke saying “Let me do your fanny shot” haha yeah NOT. However you do get pretty creative after 30 something years 🙂 I did have a Pancreas transplant which we will touch on later.
As part of this I remember how hard school was, I was in Kindergarten and I went to Spruce Elementary it was up the street from our house so I to walked to school. I remember my mom had been giving me shots in my arms to give my legs a break and it damaged some tissue on my upper arms and they were sunken in so I would get teased at school that my arms looked funny. I had special lunches brought to me as well so the kids would laugh and call me names, so cruel. I do remember that still. They were horrible, they would laugh and point and tease. To make it worse on one day in particular I had to use the bathroom and the teacher was not paying attention and I kept raising my hand, she ignored me or didn’t see me. I remember having to go so bad, I could not even hold it, I started to cry and at that time my teacher turned and asked what was wrong, well it was to late. I felt it trickle down my legs and onto the floor. I was humiliated. The kids went crazy. I always wore dresses so I remember running home cold and wet with my legs sticking together as I ran. I cried the entire way home. I was in first grade.
I’m going to Stop here for now and go shower and get cleaned up. I’ll be back later on.